Usually when I review movies I strictly devote them to teen oriented films. However, I have sick fascination for Lifetime movies and you can just thank Meg Cabot for that.
When the Princess Diaries first came out it was the days before cable in my house. When Meg would have Mia write these lists about all these melodramatic Lifetime movies I couldn’t help but be fascinated with them. So when we did eventually get on U-Verse I watched Lifetime incessantly for awhile. And I still do watch it when I want a movie that I know will be over the top and filled with melodrama. And what isn’t YA without some melodrama. So without further review here is my first Awesomely Lifetime Review.
Melodramatic Summary: Pregnancy is an epidemic. At least according to Lifetime. We find out in the opening scenes that a small Massachusetts town is experiencing a wave of teen pregnancies. Sarah, the bitchy protagonist in the movie, is friends with three of these expecting mothers. Sarah herself isn’t so sure of getting knocked up but she is obsessed over her jock boyfriend, Jesse. Meanwhile a savvy reporter of a teen blog (played by Thora Birch) decides to investigate said
backwards wholesome Massachusetts town to find out why teen pregnancies are skyrocketing.
You think the answer would be obvious right? Um, the kids are having more unprotected sex because of abstinence only sex ed class/the total embarrassment at Rite Aid whenever they have to pick up condoms. But apparently I’m wrong (well, sort of). There’s something much more to this. A pact.
And let the drama begin…..
Review: This is one of those movies you love to hate. The plot is so Lifetimey all the characters from Poor Fishing Massachusetts town are obnoxiously conservative. Look, I live in Texas. Probably one of the reddest state in the country. I’m used to ultra conservatives, but most conservatives I know are logical people. They don’t act over the top ridiculous like the ones in this movie. While it is true that my high school had an abstinence only policy, they did make sure that if you had questions you could ask. It wasn’t like they weren’t going to handout condoms or anything like that, but they were open to discussion. So it makes me a little skeptical to believe that Massachusetts, one of the most liberal states, would have such a backwards view on sex in general.
Okay, and can we talk about the mother character for a minute. She annoyed the crap out of me. And while the character was obnoxiously written I think it was in part the actress. She’s a Lifetime regular, appears in a lot of movies (usually as the mother to a trouble teen) and I just always find the characters she plays to be annoying. It’s nothing against her because she does a great job playing annoying. I just couldn’t help but smirk when I saw her character’s life fall into shambles.
Despite it’s cringe worthy moments something about this movie is enjoyable. Perhaps it’s because it’s just so awesomely bad. Or maybe it’s because all the characters get their just desserts at the end.
That’s Lifetime: You know that this is a Lifetime movie mainly because of Sarah’s mom is a Lifetime regular. Oh, and the fact that Sarah got knocked up.
Lifetime Squee: None in this movie. This is no fluff film. There’s no Dean Cain here. Though some people might like the relationship between Jesse and Sarah. But Jesse is waay, waay, too good for Sarah. Plus, it doesn’t help that he looks more age appropriate with me than Sarah.
Oh. My. God. Lifetime Moment: When the big pregnancy pact is revealed. Oh, and when Sarah almost killed herself and her unborn child with alcohol poisoning.
Overall Rating: Eight out of ten lifetime moments. The movie is horribly written, yet there is something so brilliantly bad about it that it’s a must watch when television surfing.