Five Things to be "Grateful" for in YA Lit

It’s Thanksgiving week.  Which means, that after I get through with my last class today I’ll be hunched over in my desk staying up all night trying to learn Oil and Gas and Patent Law.  Oh, and eating some turkey too.  So, in honor of this national holiday that may or may have no indirectly caused a class of people to develop smallpox and cause the European settlers to easily take over the good old USA, I decided to post a list of five things that I’m grateful for in YA Lit.

Interesting trivia that you’ll probably forget soon after reading this: Ben Franklin wanted the nation bird to be a turkey rather than a bald eagle.  I assume that he meant the wild turkey not the domesticated  bird that can barely walk that we slaughter each year so that people can have their roasted bird on the last Thursday in November.

5) World Building that Makes no Sense:

Sometimes it’s just good not to be able to understand these vast, complex, YA worlds.  Or if you are to understand them, it’s through info dump.  I just love a good info dump, don’t you?  Instead, of gradually experiencing a world, you get the jest of it right away.  It’s almost as good as getting no information at all, or for that matter information that contradicts itself.  God, you just have to love a little mystery.  Even if you never get any answers from it.  Balance is so plebeian.

4) Alexandra Adornetto and any Other Wannabe Stephenie Meyer:

Because one book about a seemingly normal girl (who’s really not that normal) that falls in love with an amazingly perfect guy who sparkles is not enough.  I have to say books like Halo and Fallen have helped me only so much with my post-Twilight Saga depression.  And then there’s all those wonderful P2P fan fictions that turned into real books.  And yeah, I know that a lot of them are adult or new adult (that just has to be my favorite new genre, ya’ll), but still Bella and Edward.  And then there’s that wonderful Fifty Shades of Grey which I know is an adult book, but it’s like the missing sex scenes from Breaking Dawn.  Finally, we know what happened on Isle Esme but it’s hotter of course.

Can you keep a secret?  I’m working on my own P2P Called Sinister Island where Bella and Edward find out that there are dinosaurs on Isle Esme and have to enlist the help of Jeff Goldblum and Indiana Jones.  Sure to be a hit, right?  Especially since I’ll be including some steamy sex scenes.  

3) Damsals in Distress:

Strong independent women are bitches.  That is a known fact.   I just want a man to rescue me just like Bella, Bethany,   Luce, or any other wonderful heroine.  Having goals in life is not important.  Having a man and a baby are.  And so what if you get married right after you graduate from high school.  It’s true love.  And true love is what’s important.  And getting your ass saved by someone everyday of the week that’s sort of hot.

2) Fun Parents:

Who wants parents who try to control your life by grounding you and setting out rules?  Who actually want to get to know you and are there for you?  Your man can do that.  Parents should just be…well, there so you can mooch off of them.  The best parents watch lots and lots of TV and never question their kid as long as they cook them something good, like Helen Hamilton’s dad.  Parents who actually have the gall to want to spend time with their kids or tell their daughter that they can’t see their paranormal boyfriend have serious issues.  Thank God, there aren’t many of them in YA.

1) Edward Cullen:

Edward Cullen is my dream man.  You know what, because of him and other too gorgeous to be real YA heros, I leave my window open at night hoping an over possessive, hot, bad boy comes in my room and claims me as his and starts controlling my life.  Heck, I’d even think about changing myself for him if that would make him happy.  One of the biggest lessons I learned in YA is that it’s not about you, it’s about your boyfriend and how to make him happy.  Oh, and if he leaves you or hurts you, it’s not because you’re making him unhappy.  No, it’s because he’s doing it to protect you (how sweet).


4 thoughts on “Five Things to be "Grateful" for in YA Lit

  1. Yes, I do think those three things would've helped BD. At the very least Goldblum could've explained what was going on with the weirdo vampire pregnancy better than Meyer did.

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