Born at Midnight: C.C. Hunter

If only Kylie could see herself, she’d slut slam.

Slut slamming.  There are many theories on why this trope exist.  An honestly I don’t give a shit about the reason for the trope only that I hate it.  Born at Midnight shows slut slamming at it’s worse.  And that’s why this review isn’t going to be very pleasant at all.  I should also note that the slut slamming was so bad that I just had to put the book down (yeah, I didn’t finish it).

I’m sort of deviating from my regular form in this review mainly because I don’t have anything nice about this book to say and this is going to be a rant more than anything else.  I don’t like being harsh.  Yes, harsh because that’s what I am apparently (long story), but sometimes you have to be a bit of a bitch and today I’m going to own my bitchiness because unlike Kylie I’m not going to try to sugar coat things.

All right, as I said before nothing good to say.  So if your a Pollyanna and want to read sunshine and roses about this book, check out some other reviews.

The biggest problem with this book is the slut slamming.  Honestly, I have a high tolerance (well, higher tolerance) than some of my fellow reviewers when it comes to slamming the slut because these are teenage girls of course they’re going to insult their fellow teenage girl or rival to some existent, but Kylie.  Wow, just wow.  This girl is a bully.  A judgmental bully who thinks everyone and their mom should have their chastity belt on.  She even goes as far to judge her best friend when her b.f.f. thinks she’s pregnant.

Yeah, character faults you say…but this book doesn’t even have the luxury of being told in first person. It’s told in third and I think that’s what killed it in part.  The tone in general is very condescending.  I don’t think it was Hunter’s intentions, but I felt like I was being talked down to the entire time I read this. And yes, I get this book was written for teens, but teens don’t want to be talked down to.  If I wanted to hear how bad sex is I’d just listen to the health teacher in Mean Girls.

Oh, speaking of teachers, the counselors at this camp Kylie is sent to are completely unprofessional.  Holiday(yes, that the counselor’s name) tells Kylie about being dumped at the alter, as well as spilling other juicy details about her love life.  Um, this is hardly professional behavior.  And seriously, it borderlines creepy.    Though the interactions with Kylie’s friends are almost as creepy. Seriously, there’s a whole chapter in this book devoted to farts which is considered to be girl bonding in this movie (seriously, thinking this book was edited by the same people who edited The House of Night books).

Yeah, farts.  It’s amazing how juvenile this book isn’t and I haven’t mentioned the catch phrase that Hunter is trying to get everyone to say (Oh, Crappers).  It’s never going to work it’s just like fetch.  Never going to happen.

God, I’m referencing Mean Girls a lot tonight.

So, Kylie sucks.  Her teacher is creepy and so are her friends.  How are the love interests in this book?  Just as bad and just as lame.  They are hardly developed.  One semi stalks her  the other I don’t know what his deal is.  And her ex?  Well, I don’t get why she’d be interested in him.  And honey, really, you’re going to be judgmental of everyone when you let him take your shirt off after…you know what, I’m digressing.

The parents suck as well.  No surprise there since all the other characters suck.  I really love how the  divorce was handled (that’s sarcasm, folks).  Having to have the not so fun experience of parental marital problems and family law, I can tell you that for the most part divorces are not black and white and the child is affected despite what the parents think.  And no Kylie’s mom, your divorce is Kylie’s business. She doesn’t need to know everything, but she should know the basics behind your break up and you should understand that’s she’s going to act out instead of abandoning her at some sort of camp for bad teenagers.

Oh yes, that’s where our darling teen is sent to a camp for bad teens, but they’re not really bad they’re supernatural.  And this is a series.  So five books (I’m guessing) are all going to take place at summer camp.  That seems ridiculously slow to me.  Six weeks are so in five books.  That’s like a week per book or a day since like two weeks had already past when I threw this  piece of shit against my wall and subjected myself to watching Pawn Stars with my dad.  But whatever…there really was no plot here so I guess that’s okay.

Okay, so there was an attempt at a plot.  Apparently, are darling special snowflake is special (who knew) even more special than most supernaturals that the oh so powerful Holiday and FRU (some supernatural branch of the FBI, X-Files much?) can’t provide answers about her sparkliness.  Of course, that’s why there are four more books I’m assuming that and we need teen angst.  But the plot has so many gaps in logic I honestly don’t care.

I so had this song in my head when I heard about the FRU.

So, what am I giving this book?   I’m not going to give it like absolutely no stars because I’ve read way worse things then this (I know, the thought), so I’m giving it a two.  It was readable and I can see some Twihards really going for it, but me I’m going to tell my librarian that this piece of filth really should have a warning sticker on it that it might affect that are sexually active or like to wear a skirt that goes above their ankles.

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2 thoughts on “Born at Midnight: C.C. Hunter

  1. It really was awful. However the author sucked me and I've read 3 of the books. I think it's the third one where you find out what Kylie is… It's obviously not even good because I just had to go and look up what she is! ARGH.

  2. Pingback: I Should Thank My Mind for Repressing this Mess: Never Cry Werewolf by Heather Davis | Howdy YAL!

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