Logical Ending: Where I AU Some of YA’s Most Illogical Books

Recently, I read two books that were complete logic fails.  And I thought it might be fun—and a bit snarky—to totally resolve various YA plots with logic.  Yes, it’s not as fun as the power of love or some mystical power that the MC can tap into, or a dramatic plot sequence that involves everything that was used in rom coms in the 80’s/90’s.  But hey, it makes anal people like me a little less on edge.

So, without further adieu let’s look at some alter endings with logic.  Note, if you don’t want the original ending you might want to skip this post

1) Everything, Everything by Nicola Yoon:

 This was actually the book that inspired this blog post.  So basically the original ending ends with this big twist that the MC’s mother is suffering from some sort of mental illness that makes her state her daughter’s ill when she’s not.

Logical Ending: Madeline is pulled into foster care after the insurance company gets suspicious of her care—FYI, with all the care she was getting they would probably want to make sure there wasn’t some insurance fraud going on there—her mother is in a padded cell and she grows up seemingly normal (or as normal as you can in foster care) and gets a Katy McGarry-ish story written about her.

2) Love and Gelato by Jenna Evans Welch:

All of the melodrama could’ve been resolved if the character read her mother’s journal in one setting.  It was like the evil plot hole was glaring at me the entire time.  Also, super bad ending with how the Matteo thing played out.  This was one of those times I wanted a contrived plot twist that seemed unrealistic.

Logical Ending: The MC finishes the journal in one setting and confronts Howard with what she found out.  Howard reveals that there was a possibility that Matteo wasn’t her father and ran a DNA test that proves that the MC is Howard’s rather than Matteo the Douche’s.  Also, that chemistry-less romance doesn’t happen and the MC ends up learning more about Florence and the rest of freaking Italy throughout the book and I can enjoy my summer Euro book more.

3) The Glittering Court by Richelle Mead:

Oh, Richelle Mead, this was one heck of a logic fail.  I didn’t even understand why the character thought it was a good idea to join the Glittering Court it seemed like a worse fate than the one that was given to her—exchanging an arrange marriage that she knows to an arrange marriage with a stranger.

Logical Ending: Our MC, whose real name I never learned since I DNF’d the monstrosity. Is only using the Glittering Court to get to the new land but somehow gets discovered and gets blackmailed into staying and learns that the court is really more than pretty dresses and all that jazz.  Maybe then, just then, I could buy all of this garbage.

4) Into the Dim by Janet B Taylor

What is the secret to a good time traveling book: get the period you’re going back to correct.  It’s not just the big details that matter, but the small minute details have to be taken into consideration as well.  Like, you know, how modern English wasn’t used in Eleanor Aquitaine’s.  Note, Taylor, Shakespearian English IS the beginning of modern English.

Logical Ending: The characters go back to Eleanor’s time not knowing the language and die of the plague and/or something that you can die of without modern antibiotics.  Later on in the present someone who works for one of those History Channel conspiracy shows finds their skeletons which conspicuously feature some sort of modern day technology on them and makes a ridiculous episode about it for their conspiracy show which will most likely feature aliens .

5)  Red Girl, Blue Boy by Lauren Baratz-Logsted

This book was so cringe worthy with faux pas that could’ve been solved with a really good publicist, stylist, and handler.  Don’t tell me the GOP nominee wouldn’t have those….oh, wait.

Logical Ending:  The MC is sent to a Swiss boarding school during the election cycle and is only allowed to sit/stand next to her father and look pretty like most nominee’s kids do during holidays/family centered events etc.  The audience is spared this train wreck and I magically get my twenty dollars back.

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